


mistake a warm winter for spring

by zulu



Category: House M.D.
Genre: Character of Colour, F/M, Female Protagonist, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-15
Updated: 2010-10-15
Packaged: 2017-10-13 12:44:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/137504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zulu/pseuds/zulu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The only love worth fighting for is one that you can win.</p>
            </blockquote>





	mistake a warm winter for spring

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bell (bellaboo)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellaboo/gifts).



> Happy monthiversary!

"I hate you." Amber paced into the bedroom, trying to leave Eric behind. Since her pace was about that of an over-eating elephant seal, it didn't do much good. Eric followed at her heels like a concerned puppy, when all she wanted was to get out of her shoes and sleep for approximately eternity. "This is all your fault."

Now that it seemed that she'd made her way into the bedroom without falling over, Eric sat down on the edge of the bed and chuckled. "Don't you think that's a little cliched?"

Amber turned on him, glaring. "It's a cliche for a reason," she said. She was carrying his fetus, and he wasn't the one going up a dress size a week or scarfing down whatever the hospital cafeteria was pawning off as food just to ease the insane urges of her stomach. It was his fault.

Eric gave her a mournful, apologetic look and reached for her hand. His thumb rubbed circles in the center of her palm, and Amber hated that it helped. "What can I do?" he said. With a hopeful smile, as if he was asking for a longed-for privilege, he said, "I can rub your feet?"

"Stop being so solicitous," she said. "Five months ago you wouldn't have massaged my feet if I bribed you with a blowjob."

Eric snorted and gave her a sudden tug. Off-balance, Amber stumbled into his knees and sat down on his lap. Her center of gravity was too far forward, and he knew it. "So you want me to give in to my baser urges?" he asked, taking her in his arms and settling her weight more evenly on his legs.

"You're not winning any points," Amber sniffed, although her body traitorously disagreed. His hug felt soothing and warming, no matter if she knew intellectually that he was trying to distract her from a bad day and a worse case of raging hormones.

Eric gave a non-committal reply and started kissing her neck attentively. His beard rasped over her skin, sensitizing it, and then his lips followed, full and soft and warm. Amber shivered, poised between irritation and encouraging him. Elbowing him right in the pit of his stomach would serve him right. But his tongue had found that spot--damn him--and he was sucking at her shoulder, just below the knot of tension along her spine that she could never get rid of. His teeth were sharp and firm, sending spurts of sparks straight to her nipples, and down to her clit. He wasn't even touching her and it was almost too much. Her breasts were swollen and sensitive, her nipples larger and darker, and it was _his fault_. Eric's tongue swirled over the sensitive area again and again, the suction and his tongue soothing and exciting. "I never should have let you talk me into this," Amber said, hating the entreating moan that sounded in her voice.

"Sex?" Eric asked, trying to hide a low, husky laugh. He paused for a moment, and then started kissing her again. Delicately, as if she was some frail flower that might bruise under a real touch. Amber would spur him on to better efforts if only it didn't feel so good. The quiet wave of shivers was rising like a silent tide, and she was starting to ache between her legs, needy and wet. It was the hormones.

"You know what I meant," Amber said. She hated the petulance in her own voice. No one ever forced her to do what she didn't want. Eric didn't touch her if she didn't want. And then this had happened, and her whole world had been turned upside down. You didn't become the head of a department when you had brats tugging at your skirts. You didn't get anywhere when every move was weighed down by diaper bags. You didn't get any of the things Amber wanted to get. No respect, no interviews, no sixty-hour-a-week jobs. She'd made her plans. She never should have changed her mind.

Eric stopped, resting his chin on her shoulder. Amber could feel the rumble of his voice through her back, pressed against his chest, and the vibration in his throat. His breath caressed her neck, rushing warmly over the exact spot he'd been teasing so diligently. "Are you okay?" he asked.

She could really hate him, if only she didn't love him. When she'd told him the news, Eric had stared at her, and Amber thought it was with the same horror she'd felt. For that split second, she was sure they were in agreement, that there didn't even have to be a discussion. And then he broke out into the widest, happiest smile she'd ever seen, and swept her into his arms. Her heart had stopped. She realized what he wanted; she'd pictured it, their baby, their family. And suddenly the decision wasn't easy. "I'm fine," she snapped. "Are you stopping? The batteries in my vibrator are fresh. You could at least pass it to me."

Eric huffed against her shoulder. He tightened his arms around her and pulled her back. Through their clothes, his body was hard and warm and so easy to lean back against. His hands swept over the swollen curve of her stomach and then down her thighs. Slowly, he pulled up the hem of her skirt, and massaged her thighs as he moved up. The deep, hard presses felt amazing. She'd been on her feet all day--no fucking way she'd let anyone else get a procedure she could still do, chase down a clue she could still reach first. And Eric had always known how to ease the tension out. His hands were strong, pushing the tiredness away, but it only deepened the need for him to touch her. Amber let her arms fall on top of his, gripping his wrists and urging him higher. "If I wasn't this horny all the time, you'd be so dead," she said.

Eric bit her shoulder again. Amber gasped, arching. "I want to make love to you," he said. His voice was low and intimate, familiar and loving.

Sudden tears prickled Amber's eyes. She was carrying around at least thirty extra pounds. Her ass was mammoth, her ankles swollen, her breasts droopy and veiny. And she wouldn't be _crying_ about it if it weren't for the stew of estrogen cracking her control. "Don't lie to me." God, her voice sounded broken.

Instead of answering, Eric hitched his hips forward. His erection pushed against her ass. "You're gorgeous," he murmured. With one hand, he worked at the buttons on the disgusting maternity blouse she was wearing. Her bra was even worse, ecru and immense, fastened in front. There was nothing sexy about it, nothing alluring. If she asked, Eric would do nothing but get her off and then take care of himself--he'd done it before when she was too sensitive for anything else--but he didn't hesitate to tell her what he wanted.

He never demanded. He respected her, and that was worse. Amber could handle demands because all they required was a flashing, haughty refusal. But Eric never threatened, never blustered. After their first stormy argument--about how they'd been together for years, how he loved her, how he wasn't leaving her, how the timing was perfect, how he wouldn't let her be tied down to childcare, how he wanted her child--they'd lived in an equally stormy silence for a week, all thundery rumbles and black looks. Eric sulked; Amber bit the head off anybody who got in her way. She hated his trust. He'd given her nothing to defy, no ultimatum to shoot down. She knew he was lying about helping just as much. Eric didn't sacrifice. His career would end up more important. His advancement would end up meaning more, and she'd be staying home with a wailing, spit-upping monster. The promises he'd made would be broken, and she'd end up hating both him and herself.

"Amber," Eric said. "Tell me what you want."

His hands were so hot against her skin, and yet Amber felt like she was the one burning with fever. He'd opened her blouse and unhooked her bra, and with his fingertips, he circled her aureola. She wanted nothing but for him to finally _touch_ her, and at the same time, she knew the second he went too far it would be too much and she'd flinch away, all her arousal wasted. She hated changing like this, not knowing what her own body would want. Her throat was heavy but she wasn't sad; her clit was throbbing and yet the wrong pressure, friction too soon, would make her whole body clamp down in knots that wouldn't be loosened for far too long. "Touch me," she said. "Slowly."

Eric kissed her throat, and then his palm brushed over her nipple. The sensation was immediate, so intense that Amber gasped. "Like that," she said, "Eric," in case he'd be scared off. Everything she'd felt before was orders of magnitude away from this. The whispered touch was setting her on fire, the rampant, desperate need inside her vagina deepened. Amber wanted him. Like this--if only they wouldn't have to shift positions. But she was heavy, ungainly. She'd need a crane to lift herself onto Eric's dick. The image was so pathetic, and yet so accurate, that she felt caught between laughing and crying.

"Hey," Eric said. "We can stop."

"Shut up!" Amber heaved forward, struggling off his lap. She turned to face him, her clothes a mess, her breasts exposed and nipples tight. Glaring, she looked him up and down. He was too put together, too damn clean. "Take off your clothes."

Eric blinked, but he didn't question her. His erection was pressed against the front of his pants, and he opened his fly first, letting the pants fall and kicking them away. Amber matched him, dragging down the skirt with the wide elastic panel in the front, the granny panties, letting her blouse and bra fall on top of them. Her body had betrayed her, or maybe she'd betrayed herself. Thinking too much about how beautiful Eric's children would be, how good a father he would be--he was always softer, at home, loving and gentle, but he could be stern too. And she'd pictured herself with the baby in a sling, tied to her breast, or later, stumping along beside her with one chubby hand held in hers. She'd made her choice, a different one than she'd always assumed, but she wasn't going to blame it on him. Even if Eric came to his senses and realized she'd never be slim again, her breasts would never be slight and high. She'd chosen that too, and she knew it.

Eric was still beautiful. The planes of his body, the lines of muscle and bone, were perfect. His skin was so smooth, and she knew how strong he was. The curve of his cock was long and thick, and Amber wanted it inside her. Now.

"Sit down," she said. Outside their apartment, Eric hated to be reminded of how easily she controlled him in the bedroom, but he loved it. At some point, she'd broken him of his habit of getting tense and defensive about the way he'd beg her to tie him down, or fuck him with her fingers or a dildo. He did what he was told, and he didn't pretend it was anything he didn't want when they were done. Eric sat on the edge of the bed again, one hand rubbing absently at his erection, getting fully hard for her. Amber watched, knowing how hot he'd be when she returned to his arms. Her circulation wasn't as good as it had been, and she cooled down easily, but right now she didn't care. Eric would be inside her, around her, his arms and legs bracketing hers, his cock firm and stroking inside.

Amber stepped forward, ruthlessly pushing aside the part of her brain that knew she was waddling like an obese duck, and bent just long enough to kiss Eric's uptilted mouth. Her hand joined his on his erection, and her breathing quickened at the familiar, hot feel of its length in her hand. Eric kissed her back strongly, a moan growing in his throat as she stroked him the rest of the way. They'd given up condoms now that they were worse than pointless, and Amber was already wet enough that she knew she'd take him in so easily. "Like this," she said. "Stay right there."

She straightened up, easing the pain in her lower back, and turned around. Eric's hands were on her hips immediately, steadying her. He drew her back, urging her to spread her legs, until her feet were on either side of his. "Come on," he said, pulling at her lightly.

Amber took a deep breath and eased down. Her thighs strained, but then she felt the tip of Eric's cock between her labia, and the slip of his hand as he spread her moisture down his erection. His breathing was light and quick, and she moved down further, until he could guide himself inside her. Panting, Amber lowered herself, the stretch and heat of Eric's cock distracting her from the tension in her back and legs. "Oh, God," she said, feeling him enter her. This moment, when all she could think about was relaxing enough to accommodate him, when pleasure balanced pressure, was even better than she'd hoped. She couldn't draw it out as long as she would have liked, but soon she was sitting on him again, her legs splayed slightly, leaning forward as much as she could in order to feel the deep, incredible rub of Eric's cock against her g-spot. "Eric," she whimpered, and his arms were there, around her, tugging her into a close, tight hug.

"There, oh yeah," he said. "Amber honey..." The endearment was more than familiar by now, but it still spiked all the emotions in her that it had at first. Intimacy and love, but fear too; the certainty that he had to be kidding, that he was teasing her, that it was a joke for him to feel that way. Resentment, that he could make her feel so much with a word.

But her body was clamouring so loudly for every strand of her attention that she let it pass. Eric wrapped his right arm around her middle, supporting her as well as he could, while his left hand kneaded her thigh. "You feel so good," he said, his voice more strained now, tensing in his throat.

"Touch me," Amber said. "Eric, please." Despite the desire pounding as hard as her heartbeat, she couldn't move nearly as much as she needed to. She was too heavy to thrust against him, and Eric was pinned between her and the bed. The sheer fact of him inside her was so close to enough, so close. She squeezed him with her muscles to hear him groan, and then his fingers reached between her legs. He didn't touch her clit directly, but rubbed on either side, just above, and around again in a pattern she couldn't predict. It felt, oh, it felt so good, the pleasure ripping through her thighs and belly, concentrating around the heat of Eric's thick, hot cock inside her, his fingers bringing her more pleasure than she'd thought was possible. She was crying out, too wrapped up in the sensation to know what she was saying, only begging him for more. More, but not too much. There, yes, again, again, his hips moving as much as he could manage to give her that exquisite friction inside as well. It was wonderful, Eric's arms pulling her against his chest, his fingers drawing electric sensation from her clit, his cock filling her. "Oh--oh Eric-- _yes_ ," she said, and with another hard, circling rub above her clit, Eric brought her off. Her orgasm rushed along her nerves, a release so strong it was like plunging into the feeling as it overwhelmed her entire body. Amber clutched Eric's knee in one hand, his arm in the other, and rocked against him, as powerfully as she could. She gasped again, sweat slipping between them, and at last she fell back against Eric's chest, breathing hard.

He was still hard inside her, and it felt amazing. Amber's muscles rippled with aftershocks, clenching down on Eric's cock, making her shiver with delight each time. "Are you close?" she murmured, languid, her voice husky with satisfaction.

Eric shook his head. "Not yet."

Now that she was paying attention, Amber could feel the tension in his muscles, the sweat on his chest. She tried to roll her hips again, but the movement began to chafe, and her legs were already aching. Reluctantly, Amber braced herself against Eric's shoulder and stood up, pulling off him. "Lie down," she suggested. She crawled onto the bed, feeling every one of her extra pounds, the awkward shape of her body. Eric lay beside her, meeting her eyes. His were tired, but alight with happiness. Amber smiled. "You know if I could bend that way, I'd be sucking you," she said languorously. Eric's hand was already moving between them. Satisfied, Amber drew her hand over Eric's head, down to his cheek, cupping it gently before kissing him. "I love the way you taste," she said, taunting him and driving him on. "The way you feel in my mouth. So hard, aren't you, Eric?"

He swallowed hard, eyes closing briefly. "Yeah."

Amber hummed contentedly, enjoying the way his pace increased as she murmured to him, telling him how hot he was, how much she wanted him to come. His eyes were gorgeous, dark and focusing on her face. With a sharp, tight groan, Eric climaxed, jerking sharply a few times before slowly relaxing next to her, a smile on his face so tender that it hurt to see.

She loved him. That was the danger, that and the fact that Eric hadn't broken any promises to her. From time to time he'd asked for more than she could give; and they'd fought, so many times, over what was _right_ ; but he'd never gone back on his word, once he'd given it. He'd promised her that he would give up as much as her for their baby, and in the end, she'd believed him, against all her better instincts. She kissed him again, softly, and Eric kissed her back with the slack gentleness that meant she'd made him feel good. After they'd traded small touches for a few moments longer, Eric got up and pulled the sheets and blankets over her. "It's only six," she protested, but the baby wouldn't be denied. She was napping more now than she could remember since before med school, and every minute of sleep was precious.

"Rest," Eric said, and kissed her forehead lightly. She could hear him distantly, pulling on casual clothes and closing the bedroom door, but whether he'd headed for the bathroom or the living room, she'd slipped to deeply into her doze to know.

That was the most terrifying part. How much she might be losing herself, without even knowing it. Every decision pushing her farther and farther along a path she'd sworn she'd never take. But each step felt inevitable once she'd taken it. She'd fallen in love, fallen so hard that she'd let him move in with her. She'd given him so much of herself, but he'd given just as much back. And now she could feel the thump and flutter of his baby, woken up by her stillness and getting in its exercise while she tried to sleep. Amber turned her face into Eric's pillow, breathing in his scent. Somehow she couldn't trace all the moments that had led to this moment, but in this moment she was warm, satiated, secure; she had all of Eric's promises keeping the fear at bay.

When she woke up, he'd be there.


End file.
